You owe it to yourself

Every now and then, when I want a laugh, I read the back of a can of Tony Chachere's Original Creole Seasoning. I keep it on the table and I use it all the time...as directed:

Tony Chachere's world-famous Original Creole Seasoning is an extraordinary blend of flavorful spices prized by cooks everywhere. You owe it to yourself to experience how much it actually enhances the flavor of meats, seafood, poultry, vegetables, eggs, soups, stews and salads, even barbecue and French fries -- There is no finer seasoning! Use it anytime or anywhere on any type of food.

I like to read it out loud sometimes, in stentorian and commanding tones.

I also like how it says "even barbecue and French fries" when those are really obvious targets f0r a seasoning composed mainly of red pepper, garlic powder, and salt. They don't mention how great it is on cantaloupe. Yes, cantaloupe.